Andrew Korge could make anyone a Frank Artiles fan

Andrew Korge could make anyone a Frank Artiles fan
  • Sumo

One of the scariest things that could happen Tuesday is thatelection2016 Trust Fund Baby Andrew Korge could actually win a seat on the Florida Senate.

God help us all.

Because he really doesn’t deserve it. Not only has Korge done nothing at all notable in his short adult life but live off his Papi’s millions, he has also behaved during this campaign alternately like an entitled cry baby and a bully with a big bat (read: wallet). He has not behaved like someone who could be a senator.

The self-righteous little punk has driven fear into the hearts of local Jews by trying to make Bullard look like a terrorist sympathizer. Korge had a fundraiser last week in Aventura — bet he pronounced his name Korge with a hard G, there, and not Kor-hay like Jorge —  where he told contributors and supporters that Bullard is soft on Israel (although he is a state senator, not a U.S. Senator) and wears a scarf that might look like a Palestinian Kaffiyeh.

But Ladra bought her brother a scarf for Christmas that looks a lot like the one in the picture of Bullard. I got it at Dadeland Mall. At Abercrombie & Fitch. I’ve seen them on the accessory wall at DSW, too.

Also, I wear a lot of Indian jewelry and clothing — and that doesn’t make me Hindu. This is America, and Miami even, where we can adopt customs from other cultures without being judged.  Korge sure can adopt our Latino culture. In an appeal to Hispanic voters, he has taken to pronouncing his name like Jorge with a K (Kor-hay).

Read related story: So much Andrew Korge in the mailbox — maybe a record

He’s also spent a lot of money on mailers. But you can’t be sure exactly how much just by looking at his campaign reports, because he doesn’t list them as such. In fact, the PAC — which has sent the majority of mailers — has no mailer or postage expense line items at all. Ladra had to assume those fall under the “media” expenses paid to David Heller’s company, Main Street Communications. That amounted to about $220,000. Korge has spent almost that much on his media buys and production as well, but the Andrew Korge mailermail budget has to be a record number. (Heller is going to have a nice holiday season this year. Tip: Don’t buy your male relatives scarves from Abercrombie & Fitch.)

Ladra lives in District 40. My home got 24 mail pieces from the Korge campaign. Most of them are negative attacks on Sen. Dwight Bullard, the incumbent, and former State Rep. Ana Rivas Logan, who “suspended her campaign precisely to avoid the dirty campaign — she could fly under the radar and win — but she got hit anyway.

Korge wants to be senator so bad he tried to buy his way in. He offered Bullard $25,000 to drop out of the race. Oh, not in cash. An investigation into allegations of bribery found no wrongdoing because all Korge did was offer to raise $25,000 for Bullard — but in another seat.

Read related story: Andrew Korge still shops around for a seat — or a sellout

“Dwight lied to voters and the media,” Korge told Ladra in a text message on Friday, all excited that he could spin the news into an exoneration. Because Dwight didn’t lie.

The Miami Herald story said “Korge’s claim was bolstered by text messages that showed Bullard, weeks earlier, had asked for help from Korge in fundraising, according to a final report on the investigation released Thursday by the Miami-Dade State Attorney’s Office.”

The problem with that is “weeks earlier” was when Korge was running in another seat, against Sen. Anitere Flores, and could have been seen as a Bullard ally. There’s nothing wrong with Bullard seeking fundraising help from one of the most prolific Democratic fundraising families in South Florida. It was actually smart.

But for Korge to make the offer again after he jumped into the race against Bullard should constitute bribery,  Ladra is thinking that the definition of bribery needs to be expanded. Because the intention is the same.

Now he is trying to buy the seat with $800,000 spent between his campaign and his PAC. Ladra bets it goes up to $1 million before the primary is over. He seems like the kind of politician who might just be willing to throw money at anything. He might do the same thing with our tax dollars.

Baby Korge also has a robocall telling voters that a vote for Rivas Logan will not count. Don’t you believe it. The man who would be senator is lying through his teeth. That’s how much he wants to be a senator, dammit. Because he knows damn well that a vote for Ana Rivas Logan will count. That is why he has spent good money attacking her, too.

There are three candidates in the Democratic primary for Senate in district 40
There are three candidates in the Democratic primary for Senate in district 40

The Democrat in Ladra’s house voted for Rivas Logan and we will argue that she didn’t have to campaign to win. Her name recognition alone had polls showing Ana beating both before she suspended the campaign and their negative back and forth could help her rise above it all.

Read related story: Senate 40 race: Ana Rivas Logan still in it, could win it

But, yes, Ladra is scared that Rivas Logan didn’t do enough and Korge — with his mailbox fetish and TV ads and fear-inducing robocall — could take the crown. Is this how Korge will treat elected office? Will he lie and cheat and bribe his way to success there? The end justifies the means?

He’s going to be insufferable for sure.

It’s almost enough to make Ladra support Frank Artiles, the state rep who is running against whatever Democrat wins in November.

So, if you’re a Democrat in District 40, please vote for Rivas Logan or Bullard. Don’t make Artiles the lesser of two evils.