Miami Beach elections end as expected with Gelber, Gongora, Samuelian

Miami Beach elections end as expected with Gelber, Gongora, Samuelian
  • Sumo

There were no surprises in the Miami Beach elections, which ended Tuesday with Mayor Dan Gelber getting 82% of the vote against three nobodies who each got single digits and former Commissioner Michael Gongora coming back to the dais, as largely expected, with 65% over restauranteur Adrian Gonzalez, who got 35%.

In the other race, Mark Samuelian, who lost his first bid two years ago, came in with 68% over Rafael “Wild Willy” Velasquez, who still got 32% despite having whipped out his penis last month in an ill-fated effort to woo Commissioner Kristen Rosen Gonzalez.

It’s still gonna be awkward for Rosen Gonzalez because she had openly helped Velasquez, but at least she doesn’t have to worry about his willy on the dais.

She also doesn’t have to worry about Mayor Philip Levine messing her up anymore. Levine decided not to run for re-election because, as he announced last week, he is running for governor instead. God help us all.

Read related story: Michael Gongora, Mark Samuelian lead Miami Beach Commission money race

Ladra hopes that this means there is a change in the climate at City Hall, where Levine led with fear and intimidation. Gelber may be his own man or he might be, as some suggest, Levine’s hand-picked successor (after Ricky Arriola tanked in the polls). But he was a senator once and is the son of the great former mayor Seymore Gelber so Ladra expects a lot from him.

Samuelian, too, has a lot to live up to after being endorsed by nearly every former elected in the city. But he lucked out when former Commissioner Michael Grieco — who eventually resigned as part of a deal with the Miami-Dade State Attorney’s Office for his PAC’s illegal campaign contribution — dropped out of the race (more on that later).

Can Miami Beach leave all this nastiness in the past and start new with three new electeds on the dais? We still have Arriola and a couple of other Levine puppets doing his bidding up there, but will Gelber make them moot?

The election ended Tuesday as expected but the real political machinations have just begun.

3 Responses to "Miami Beach elections end as expected with Gelber, Gongora, Samuelian"

  1. Jackson Rip Holmes   November 8, 2017 at 6:29 am

    Dear Publisher DeValle and Esteemed Political Cortadoto Readers:

    Might I ‘sound off’?

    Your write-up was comical, thoughtful, and insightful.

    The Levine proposed 2 AM liquor curfew is yet another, to me, outrageous effort to return to the days when Miami Beach was an old-age, New York retiree, community, when the highlight f one’s day on South Beach was to come home and say, “I met someone 104 years old today!”

    That’s like someone in Las Vegas trying to take that City back to “the good ole days”, when the whole area was nothing but Desert!

    Thank you sincerely,

    J. Rip Holmes

  2. Hermanna   November 10, 2017 at 1:17 pm

    “but at least she doesn’t have to worry about his willy on the dais.”

    That’s just too funny. I have not heard the word “willy” in quite some time.

    Fun fact: Florida Armenian-American group went 3-for-3 in Miami Beach with endorsements of the above 3 candidates. Samuelin apparently is first elected official in Miami-Dade of Armenian descent. I wonder what their screening criteria was for Gelber and Gongora.

  3. Pingback: New Mayor Dan Gelber endorses Deede Weithorn for State House – Political Cortadito

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.